God had some interesting things up His enormous sleeves.

So I have some rather exciting news to tell everyone. Those of you on Facebook knew there was something coming up. If you're on Facebook, and you're not part of my Facebook Prayer group, click here and join.

So there was a reason my support raising has been slow. God had some interesting things up His enormous sleeves.

So God has been working on my heart in the last couple months. As I knew I was going to move back to Portland, I was looking forward to going back to my home church, The Well. I just love that church, and had been missing participating on the worship team. Actually, I had been looking forward to beginning to lead worship on Sundays, a return to a time in my life when leading worship had been one of my favorite things to do. Upon my return to Portland, I got involved in the worship team immediately, already enjoying myself immensely. A couple weeks into being back, I had a conversation with Travis, The Well's worship pastor. He has been working toward planting a church for the last year and a half, through Northwest Church Planters. They really put him and his wife Erin through the ringer to determine if they really should plant a church. They have been recommended to plant a church, and will begin that process in September. So I was talking to Travis about his upcoming shift into church planting mode, and how he would be reducing himself to 1/4 time at The Well. He wanted to know if I would be interested in coming alongside him for this year, and then take over altogether the following year.

I have some baggage when it comes to working at a church. In fact, I wrote about it in the posting below. So while I thought it might be fun to try regular worship leading again, I definitely needed to think and pray about it.

Mandi and I have been trying to pursue what it is that God would have us do with regard to our relationship and moving overseas. We had been trying to figure out what would get us to the field the fastest, though perhaps these courses of action weren't the wisest. The new proposal of leading worship at The Well would mean a delay in getting out to the field (something neither of us really wanted) but would give us time to make wise decisions and wise courses of action for the next steps in our lives. Leading at The Well would also give us a chance to become an integral part of the church, further solidify ourselves in our community and give us even greater support when we did leave for Thailand.

So I told Travis I wasn't willing to commit to anything at that time, but that I would certainly think and pray about it. After a week or two of thought and prayer, I was coming around to the idea. I arranged to meet Travis for lunch to further discuss all of this. When Mandi heard I was meeting Travis for lunch, she put two and two together (with astonishing speed, actually), and asked if they were going to offer me the worship leader position. I told her about the things Travis and I had discussed, and she got this huge grin on her face. While it would mean a delay in our getting to the field, it would provide certain elements to our future together that could be really fruitful. Mandi's excitement only further solidified what it was that God was doing in my heart. I met with Travis and told him I was very interested in the idea, and that Mandi had figured it out and was excited as well.

So Travis brought our discussions before the church elders, and in a short time I had arranged to meet with elder and missions pastor CJ. We talked for an hour about the ins and outs of my heart for worship ministry, and how this development could affect my future work with Pioneers. One thing I appreciated the most about our discussion was CJ's comment that he wanted to make sure that he was not responsible for keeping us from the mission field by pressuring me into this new role. After explaining the situation, that it would provide opportunity for growth and wisdom, he was fine with my take on things. We definitely talked about the way that it seemed God was orchestrating everything in His perfection, that His influence in the timing of my return to Portland and their desperation for a leader was not coincidental. CJ told me I would hear a more definitive word from the elders with the next couple weeks.

A week and a half later, I met with two more elders, Jeremiah and Eric, and they officially offered me the position. We had a great conversation, and I got even more excited that I would get to work with these guys on a regular basis. So, the official word is this: I will take over much of the worship responsibilities over the next year as Travis transitions out, and then take over entirely the following year. The game begins in September.

One more positive note, the compensation I will be receiving from my work at the church will more than make up for my meager financial needs each month, something I had been stressing about. I moved to Portland on faith, something I don't often do. I didn't have solid work lined up, something that makes me worry. But He had an awesome plan in the works, and I'm so glad He gave me the strength and patience to wait for His plan to play out. This is one of the few times in my life where I have nothing I can take credit for. So often, God will do something amazing, and I end up taking at least a little bit of credit for it. But this situation, I can't even entertain the idea that I had anything to do with it. He's just so good!

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How I Lost the Church

Back in 2000, I became a staff member at a church for the first time. I was to be in charge of a group of high-schoolers, the worship team for our church's youth group. I had been asked to help out in that area by one of the youth leaders I knew from my own high-school youth group experience. Things were a little rough at the beginning, but in a short time we were becoming a close-knit group, and a pretty good band of worshippers. At that time, I was meeting regularly with the youth leader, and with the church's worship pastor, both men I respected and enjoyed. The first year working in that environment was positive and encouraging, and the reaction from the general youth group populace was increasingly favorable. Some of these kids were having their first true worship experience on Wednesdays at youth group. God was doing some pretty great things in and through our group.

The next year was beginning, and the situation changed a bit. The church decided to hire an additional worship pastor, and required me to meet with him weekly as some sort of required discipleship. My impression of this guy was that he was the most fake person I had ever worked with, just one of those churchy über-positive guys that just don't exist outside of a church environment. In my 20-year-old wisdom, I decided I didn't like this guy at all. I had no respect for him, and therefore would, in some sort of a passive-aggressive temper-tantrum, make our meetings as difficult as possible. (Thanks God for wisdom and age, no?) I was unresponsive and generally dour as we met weekly and interacted as a part of our work week. There was not a single part of me that liked this guy, and not a single part of me willing to be even remotely civil to him. Today I'm willing to fess up to the fact that I was a royal pain in the backside to this guy. My problem was that I just could not believe he was being real with me. Everything in my brain told me he was just another church guy, just another one of those phony Christians. There was also some serious depression lurking around the corner of my life, which was just beginning to consume me for the next few years.

Early in 2002, after having been around this guy for eight or nine months, I was called into a surprise meeting with him. He basically laid it out that I had been inordinately difficult, and that even trying to work with me was a ludicrous affair. Then he dropped a bomb on me. His words were: "You bring death into the room." That phrase was permanently seared into my brain, words I will never forget. Hyperbole? I certainly hope so. True? At least partially.

I think the problem I now have with that meeting was that there was little or no attempt to understand my side of the issue. I was certainly being a baby about certain issues, but there were some underlying issues, even some early signs of depression, that were never addressed. One step back from the situation would have provided a few clues that I wasn't doing so well in life, and that perhaps an attempt at understanding rather than condemning would have been prudent.

After that fateful meeting, things really didn't improve, aside from trying desperately to pretend everything was okay, that everything was on the mend. Of course the issues were still there because nothing was dealt with. Condemnation was doled out, but there was no attempt at understanding, and certainly no compassion. So I continued working with the youth group worship team for the next few months. Playing and practicing with them was still the highlight of my week, despite the interpersonal difficulties lining the periphery of working at the church. In the spring I was asked to come to a meeting with all the head-honchos at the church. To their credit, they really are a bunch of Christ-loving guys, and I still highly respect them in many ways. They brought me into their meeting room to tell me that the money they had been paying me was needed elsewhere, and that they would be terminating my pay. Any idiot can see that they were trying to passively scoot me aside. Unfortunately I was not just any idiot. Honestly I didn't get what they were trying to do, and volunteered to continue working with the kids for free. Working with the kids was the most enjoyable thing I could possibly think of, and I enjoyed it immensely week to week. The kids in the youth group loved it, the kids in the worship team loved it, and I loved it even more than they did.

So I didn't get the hint, and kept working at the church for free. Another couple months went by, and there was another meeting with the same group of pastors from the church. I can still see the room, sterile white, blinds letting filtered light fall on the large conference table in the center of the room. They brought me into the room, and told me what they probably should have told me the first time: they needed someone else. The way they worded it, there was the impression that they really just wanted anyone else. I was informed that I would still be welcome to participate on the Sunday worship team, but that my relationship with the youth group worship team was over. There was no explanation as to why it was over, just that it was over. They let me know who would be taking my place: a guy with a great heart but who was totally unqualified for the job, which was a bit of a slap in the face. So I had to break the news to my worship team kids, and never showed up at youth group again. As I had not been given adequate explanation as to the full reason for my termination, I couldn't even fully explain to my kids why things ended like they did. At that point I disappeared from that church, and buried myself in layer upon layer of depression, eventually culminating in the darkest years of my life.

I don't write about this to just be dark and hopeless. This was a painful and pivotal moment that brought both understanding and wariness of The Church in subsequent years. But God, in His Grace, has brought me full circle, and has restored me to a state I had never before known. His body, The Church, can be a beautiful thing. Like the blind man who got Jesus' spit-balls in his eyes, my vision has been restored, and my hope renewed. He is good, even when it takes a downward spiral into the pit to understand it.

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Graceful Loser

I've now been living in my room for close to two weeks, for those of you waiting for an update and not getting one. It is a burnt orange color with gray and white. I should have included a picture for those of you not connected to me on Facebook, but I'm currently hiding from my great new room as the weather pushes 105 degrees, and my room gets even hotter than that with the sun streaming through the windows. So right now I'm sitting at my sister and brother-in-law's house, directly in front of their air conditioner, enjoying the sensation of cool comfort.

I've been working on a wedding video for friends Sam and Amanda who got married in Michigan, June 13. I think I'm more pleased with their video than I have been with any of my other wedding videos. I'll include a couple clips down below for your viewing enjoyment/critique. I'm finally able to slow down a bit and work on getting my website running with portfolio material. I need work badly, and have very little to work with these days. Some days are brimming with optimism, and other days are laced with pessimism, a sinking feeling that things just won't work. Overall, however, I really need to continue to understand that He's got it all in His control, and that my job is simply to be diligent with what he's given me. I also think I'm learning how to be a graceful loser. There have been times in my life when my handful of talents have afforded me a much greater level of success than I probably should have gotten. For instance, in highschool I could get away with practicing music very little, and still get top placements in bands and orchestras. It was an unrealistic way to learn about success and failure, and I think the last decade has been about learning how to be a graceful loser, as I've done quite a bit of losing. Let's hope I don't lose the lessons learned, no?

So yeah, please pray for jobs, people needing videography in the NorthWest. The leads I've had have fallen through, which is a bit discouraging, but there are other brides and grooms in the sea, so to speak. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers. Enjoy the video clips.

Cheers.

Sam and Amanda Just Married from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

This is a clip from Sam and Amanda's wedding in June of 2009. It's been a pleasure to work on this for them. Blessings all around.

Get Up Offa That Thing from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

It may have taken a short time for everybody to warm up to the dancing after the reception, but once they warmed up, it was a real party. Kudos to all the friends and fam of Sam and Amanda for cutting rugs with such fervor.

Sam is a Golf Pro from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

Day before the wedding, the boys went out for a round of golf. Sam is the man.

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Two weeks away from the blog

A hearty hello to everyone!

Missed another week. But with good reason.

A week and a bit ago I moved all my stuff to Portland, into my new digs. I spent the last week getting supplies (we seemed incredibly, and often frustratingly, unsuccessful getting what I wanted for a good price within certain time constraints), painting the walls, scraping, sanding, scraping, sanding, scraping, and sanding the abused wood floor in my room. The floor had something like 4 layers of paint (who in the heck paints over a beautiful wood floor!?!!!) which made for some real difficulties sanding/scraping. But, I'm proud to say that today I put the last coat of sealer on the floor, and in only one week I can move in! (Slight sarcasm, as I am pretty antsy to get moved in and start living somewhat normally. But beggars can't be choosers and I'm certainly grateful for the way God worked out this living situation. It's funny how we all can look God's gift horses in the mouth, so to speak.

So right now I'm sitting at Albina Press in N Portland, which may become my regular coffee shop as it's only 0.4 miles from my house, and has wonderful coffee. I'm glad to be able to take a step back and figure out where God has me right now. I know I haven't taken any steps backward in my life's journey, but often it seems like I'm taking a lot of steps to the side. I'm sure it's all for preparation for something else, and I'm looking forward to what that might be.

Please pray for patience as I wait another week to move in. Extra special thanks to Fritz and Shannon for putting up with me for a week, and now another week.

The Rose-colored Glass is Half Full

Moving is always a bit of an emotional time for me. Often it's hard to know what to feel about leaving a place, no matter what the overall experience was like. It's as if a pair of rose-colored glasses were forced on my face, and I had no choice but to look at that location in purely positive terms. This is especially bizarre in light of my penchant for pessimism. An inexplicable rise of some sort of "good old days" syndrome.

Part of the emotional experience of moving comes from going through all my stuff as I decide what to keep, and what to throw out. I wouldn't call myself a packrat, but I think most people would be surprised how sentimental I can get over certain things. A few days ago I started looking through some plastic containers, trying my best to be ruthless as I tried to balance that scale of sentimentality and practicality. I discovered I had a drawer full of photos I have taken over the last 12 years or so. There were pictures in there from a mission trip I took in the summer of 1997. There were pictures of my highschool classmates (my highschool reunion is this weekend, and I can't think of a single reason to pay money to relive that era. It wasn't a bad time, but as I only really knew a handful of people, I could find any reason to go) and pictures of the worship team I led at Grace Community from 2000 to 2002. There were pictures of our family dog Wrecks, and pictures of the kids I worked with in the '02-'03 school year at Rabbit Creek. There were pictures of people I haven't seen in years, some I hadn't thought about since the pictures were taken, and some very dear to my heart. So I went through hundreds and hundreds of pictures, weeding out the significant ones, tossing the crappy ones. I won't miss the pictures I threw away, but I was certainly given the opportunity to relive the last dozen years of my life. Bizarre.

I have a handful of little trinkets that sit on my desk wherever I go, which I rarely notice unless I'm moving. There are my small Buzz Lightyear and Woody bendy figurines that I got in a Christmas stocking the year Toy Story came out. Toy Story is still one of my favorite movies. I have a Lego AT-ST Walker and little Lego Chewbacca my good friend Gary gave all his groomsmen when he got married. I also have a Star Wars Airspeeder from Episode II (don't worry, I didn't actually remember what these vehicles were called. I looked them up. Actually, maybe researching their names is indeed grounds for concern. I'm a nerd. It's what I do, okay?) that was given to me by Rachel Heath, I believe. Actually, when I was a kid Legos were too expensive, so the most of the Legos I got were the little sets you'd get at McDonalds, all primary and secondary colors, and you could build anything rectangular. Even today Legos seem like a luxury, especially Star Wars Legos, so the combination of two of my childhood loves is the perfect trinkety kind of thing to keep around. It's funny that I don't really think about the significance these little things have until I put them away. Life's like that sometimes, I guess.

So my time here in Bend has been great times and really difficult at other times. I got to better know a handful of people at my dad's church, and be near my dear friends the Sheldons. I got to enjoy a lot of sunshine (I think I'm addicted to Vitamin D), and the beauty that Central Oregon has to offer. However, being away from Mandi, and my Portland family and friends most of the time has been hard. Really hard. It was a bit of tease that right about the time I really felt like I had true community somewhere, I felt I needed to move back in with Mommy and Daddy. I missed my church, missed playing on the worship team there, missed the diversity of Portland, as compared to Bend. I had a hard time appreciating my job in Bend, especially since the whole goal of moving back home was to save some money so I could get out onto the mission field sooner. However, despite the consistent frustrations living in Bend, I'm glad I did. Were there any "good old days?" Probably not. But God had things he needed to teach me, and people to learn to love. So, I think the rose colored glasses have been removed, but a bit of a rosy hue remains. It's been a difficult year, but all the goodness contained therein was worth the difficulty. It's kinda like God actually knows what He's doing. :-)

I'm excited to be going, despite my moments of melancholy over the last week or so. Seriously, just look at the way God has provided for my housing! How can this move not have God's name written all over it?! So while I'm leaving the peace of living with my folks, there are new and exciting things just over the Cascades. I'm excited to share it with you guys.

Cheers.

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Back to Portland

So here's the news some of you have been sort of waiting for! I'm moving back to Portland in a week! Ta da! My friends Dan and Erin head up an organization called Lahash, whose objective is "to partner with East Africans in advocacy and care for the vulnerable, in response to Christ's love. Recently one of their local church partners, Berean Bible Church, gave them the use of a large house on BBC's property. So the Lahash folks have been working on restoring the dilapidated house to use as office space, as well as housing for travelers coming through Portland working with Lahash. (Dan or Erin, please feel free to correct me if I'm inaccurate in any way.) Lahash and BBC both have need for some media support, so Dan proposed a trade: I get housing in exchange for 8 hours a week of media work. HUGE BLESSING! I've been stressing a bit about coming back to Portland to pursue videography because there is no guarantee of work, and living accommodations can be expensive. This arrangement with Lahash is pretty much an incredible miracle God has done in my life. Special thanks are due to Mandi who is my connection with Lahash, and extra special thanks to Dan and Erin for thinking of me. Wow. He's just so stinkin' good sometimes!

My apologies for missing a blog update this last week. I was in Michigan for a week, and then my brother Drew got married, so it's been a busy couple of weeks. My friends Sam and Amanda got married in Jackson, Michigan, and they paid my way there to capture the whole event on video. It was awesome to get to play a part in their wedding, and even better that they were so generous to get me out there. The wedding was beautiful, probably one of the most sincere ceremonies I've ever experienced. I got a little misty twice that day, which is pretty serious for me. Though the ceremony itself was incredibly thoughtful, the days leading up to the wedding were some of the most fun days I've had in a while. Hanging out with Mandi, Jeff Budke, and my new friends Matt and Raeanne, made me laugh until my face hurt. Oh my gosh it was fun. From Sam and Amanda's wedding, Mandi and I drove over to West Michigan to surprise her parents for their 30th anniversary. Mandi's brother Justin helped us into a giant wrapped box, and when her parents arrived, they opened the huge present. It was pretty great to watch Mrs. Stonehouse literally jump into the air as she screamed with surprise. All the Stonehouse kids pitched in and rented a house on a lake for a few days, and a good time was had by all.

We came back from Michigan, and went straight into wedding stuff for Drew and Ashleigh. It's a bit strange watching your little brother get married, especially when he's nearly 7 years your junior. It was the first time I've ever sat in the front row at a wedding, which is pretty sweet. The wedding went well, and when they did a money dance to raise some cash for the newlyweds, I gave Drew $10 so I could dance with him. I think it was funnier to me than it was to him. But hey, I paid him, so he had to like it. I hung around Portland for another couple days, moved a little stuff into my new digs, and now I'm back in Bend for the week to get my things ready to move. It's going to be a really busy week, I think. Please pray for my sanity as I try to get all my ducks in a row, and pray that the move will go smoothly. Also pray that I won't lose sight of where it is God is taking me, as the present has a tendency to drown out the future. Thanks to you all.

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Hey everybody.

As you can see, I got the new video camera, and am enjoying the results. Keep praying I can get a lot of work so I can get it paid off. Please. Pretty please with a cherry (not maraschino) on top. Thanks.

So on Wednesday I'm heading out of town to shoot a friend's wedding. In order to do that, I had to get video done for the wedding I shot on May 30. After several entire days and a few half days, I got it finished. I don't mind how much work it is, but there are moments where I definitely need a break. Today was a nice break. I'm excited to get into the swing of doing video all the time, to establish good work patterns and such. It's going to be pretty great to spend my working hours doing what I often end up doing in my spare time (which is why I haven't read an entire book in ages, much to my chagrin.) Please pray for safety on my trip, and that I can enjoy the sometimes stressful work of wedding videography.

My little brother Drew and his wonderful fiancee Ashleigh get married in a week and a half. Please pray all goes well for that. I'll be doing some passive videography for that one (passive, as in I'm setting up a couple cameras on tripods so I can sit like a normal wedding-goer and enjoy the event.) I wanted to be able to experience the wedding, rather than just watch it through my viewfinder. I'll shoot anyone's wedding, except immediate family. I want to be there.

Anyway, those are the bland details of my life for the past week or so. Thanks so much for the support, and I look forward to continue sharing my life and footage with y'all. Here's a clip from this last wedding. Enjoy.

Fischer Wedding Reception from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

This is the first part of Chris and Carrie's reception highlights. It was an enjoyable group of people, for sure.

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Last Thursday

Here's the whole thing from Last Thursday. Enjoy.

Last Thursday from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

Ah Portland. Alberta Street on the last Thursday of the month is a feast for all the senses. Music, art, food, and characters all around.

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Fire Dancing

Went to Last Thursday last Thursday on Alberta Street. Incredibly Portlandy. More clips to come later. Enjoy.

Fire Dancers from Dayn Arnold on Vimeo.

It's been an interesting week. I have tallied the week's score for your information. It reads as follows:

Early last week my new video camera arrived. Awesome. (Score: Good things - 1, Bad things - 0) It uses special memory cards, so I had to install special drivers on my computer to read the cards. My computer slowed down, and eventually stopped booting altogether. (Good things - 1, Bad things - 1) So while I had everything backed up on another drive (an obsession I picked up a couple years back after nearly losing 3 months of work from one project) I couldn't use the computer. I had a wedding coming up that weekend and really needed to use it to offload footage as I took it with the camera. Computer problems began Tuesday night. Wednesday I took my new camera out for a spin, and it performed beautifully as I took in some nature shots from a ways out of town. (Good things - 2, Bad things - 1) Did a little time-lapse, some slow-motion. So great. Because I was already headed to Portland the next day, I arranged to meet the Apple people in Portland (I refuse to call them the Genius Bar, though that's their official title, because it's beyond pretentious.) Went to the Apple store, was given a quick fix, and I was back out the door, waiting to try the fix later. Well, the fix didn't work, (Good things - 2, Bad things - 2) so I had to make another appointment on Friday, the day before I needed it for shooting a wedding. Went in the next day, and they had to take my computer in for two days to fix it. (Good things - 2, Bad things - 3) That evening I went to play guitar at a party, for which I was being paid more than fairly for 2 hours of playing. By the end of the night, I had played 3.5 hours and was paid more than twice the original agreed amount. Also gave out some business cards to the woman who hired me because she wanted to recommend that service to her friends who also throw small events. (I didn't tell her I had never done this sort of thing before and that I was just making it up as I went along. Good things - 3, Bad things - 3) Next day didn't have the computer, which is a bummer because I needed to upload my footage onto a computer throughout the night. So I used the computer of my friend whom I hired to shoot with me. We got to the wedding and had just finished shooting the most important part, the ceremony, and discovered that one of the most important files from my friend's camera didn't transfer properly, and we ended up losing the shot. (A predicament which we know how to avoid in the future. Good things - 3, Bad things - 4) We were able to get some additional footage from the church's video camera, thanks to my obligatorily new best friend Jake. The rest of the evening went pretty well, and was an enjoyable event (Good things - 4, Bad things - 4), though with the two of us, I heard at least one comment about feeling like there were paparazzi skulking about. Also my friend Fritz, the photographer who got me both of the weekend's gigs (thanks Fritz!) let me use his fisheye lens, which gives a really unique effect when held in front of my camera.

The day after the wedding was a nice relaxed day, biked a bit in the heat, hung out with friends and fam, and it was really great. (Good things - 5, Bad things - 4) Also got to meet with CJ from my church, which was great. The next day I went and saw "UP" the new Pixar movie, in 3D, which was pretty stinking cool. ((Good things - 6, Bad things - 4) Then I had to head back to Bend, and on the way my car overheated. Actually, I forgot to mention it did the same thing on the way TO Portland, so I'm afraid the score is off by two. (Good things - 6, Bad things - 6) It was frustrating, but I made it home in one piece. I spent the evening reloading all my files onto my computer, and reinstalling the entire Adobe Creative Suite, which alone takes a couple hours. The next morning I had the computer working just fine, and decided to reinstall that camera card driver, which promptly sent my computer into a stalling and crashing trajectory. (Good things - 6, Bad things - 7) I managed to uninstall that driver and after a bit of research, found an updated driver that wouldn't do that to my poor computer. (Good things - 7, Bad things - 7) So now I could actually use my camera with my computer, and was all ready to take my loads of files from the wedding and get editing. Well, I discovered that the import process we used on my friend's computer put the files into a format unreadable by my computer. (Good things - 7, Bad things - 8) So 1.5 hours of research and $80 later I could actually read the files I needed to use and made some real headway with the footage. (Good things - 8, Bad things - 8) And from that point on, the editing has gone on relatively smoothly.

Today I worked a bit more on the wedding footage, and worked a bit for my boss here in Bend. He told me to bring my older video camera along to see if a friend of his would want to buy it from me, which would be a huge blessing, and money I can put toward the new camera. So tomorrow I'll be picking up a check for my old camera, thank you Jesus! (Good things - 9, Bad things - 8) So the last week has been just a shade above neutral. Actually, one more thing I forgot (forget editing what I write, I don't feel like updating every score just for a bit of continuity). I think I have a place to stay in Portland, possibly for free. More on that later. So it looks like the score is officially Good things - 10, Bad things - 8. So all turned out well, but what a crazy week. I think I need a nap.

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