I was on a hike with Mandi and my sister Daylan, and Daylan and I were reminiscing about Kenya. Daylan taught at an international school in Nairobi, and her first Christmas there I went over for a few weeks. It was my first trip overseas, and pivotal in the development of desires to serve overseas. Anyway, we were talking about some of our funny memories, especially the awesome safari which turned into a huge mud pit everywhere we turned. I was reminded again how much I crave doing something for Him and having adventures on top of it all. I don't want to be impatient about the whole process, but I think there may be something like righteous impatience, something that makes us look to the future instead of growing lethargic in our current situation. We do need to be satisfied in every place He has us, but He has SO MUCH for us if we give Him the controls. I want that badly.
This last Sunday I was reminded yet again that I'm not in control. Our morning worship rehearsal was really rough, mostly due to sound system issues. It ended up being a huge waste of time messing with it, and it was a bit of a frustrating mess. For those of you who don't perform music, if your sound on stage sounds crappy, it can easily remove any confidence you have in what the audience is hearing. I've been in a similar position many times, but it's never very enjoyable. Before the service began, a few of us got together and prayed over the equipment, over the instruments, over the team, over those worshipping. By the end, there was nothing but peace and joy in my heart, and it turned out to be an extraordinary time of worship. I think God likes to let things fall to pieces to show us who's really in charge. Someday maybe I'll let Him be in charge from the beginning. I can only hope to grow to that point in my life...
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